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Expanding Your Perspective on Relationships

Finding connection with your home and other material beings that will change your life.

Many indigenous cultures have traditions and beliefs connected to nature. They live in harmony with the Earth, are caretakers of the environment and have beliefs that the elements themselves have a sentient power. I've heard many stories where they have a deep relationship with nature, giving it respect and heeding the signals it communicates to them. They might even say that the environment or nature itself is a living being with purpose that evolves over time just like we do.

Years ago, I was introduced to a pagan community where they also have a very rich tradition of connecting with nature and recognizing the power that it holds. During this time, I began to consider the concept that the material things we have can hold intelligence and emotions and are not just made of metal or wood or even manmade materials. Just like a human body is made up of a collection of various materials, so are the things that surround our daily lives.

When you think about the major things in your life that are with you almost every day, you might think of things like your car, your phone and especially the place you call home. In a way, you might even consider that you have a kind of ongoing relationship as you interact with them every day. For example, when you come home from a long trip somewhere, there is something comforting about seeing your home as you turn the corner onto your street. You feel safer and more relaxed. Not so different than when you see a good friend or family member after not seeing them for a long time..

With this in mind, I decided to have a more personal relationship with my house. I started by finding out what the house's name was. The name came to me when mediating and asking the question, "What name would you like?" Instantly, the name "Veronica" came to me. We decided to interact with her just as we would with any other member of our family. We said hello when we came home. We told the house when we were leaving and how long we'd be gone. We told it how much we appreciated that it took care of us and was our guardian keeping us warm and safe.

Then, slowly, some very interesting things started to happen. We started to find little presents around the house. We would find money sitting on the counter. Or, we would notice that nagging ticking noise from the furnace simply disappeared. The house seemed warmer in the winter and cooler in the summer. Doors opened easier, locks didn't jam and even our appliances seemed to work better than before.

With this being such a success, I decided to extend my relationship to include my vehicle. Just as with the house, I sat in my vehicle, quieted my mind and ask. "What is your name?" My current truck's name is Benjamin. Benjamin is a very strong and proud truck. I love this truck and I can feel the pride it has in being strong and having every convenience I need. I've done this with many of my vehicles and, for the most part, they have all responded by having very little issues and made sure I was safe.

Opening yourself up to being more connected to your environment will start to change your viewpoint and perspective toward it. You will find yourself falling in love with those major components of your life that you may not have considered before. You will develop a symbiotic relationship that will change your life forever. You may even grieve the loss of one of them if you are suddenly separated. No longer will you see the place you live as simply a house or even a home, but a trusted family friend.

When we decided to move, it was hard to leave because of our relationship with Veronica. We decided to have a gratefulness ritual honoring Veronica for all of the years she watched over our family. I created the ritual to honor each aspect of her, highlighting the importance and meaning it held in our hearts. This was one of the most powerful and emotional rituals I've ever done. About half way through, I became so overwhelmed with emotion that another family member had to continue reading. I could feel the love of our house guardian flow through the room and the gratitude it had that we honored her.

It may seem silly at first to have a relationship with your house or vehicle, but I promise you it is worth it. You will start to see the effects of opening up your heart to so many other aspects of life all around you. The love and acceptance will multiply and you will have more connection with life than you ever had before.

- Dwight J. Raatz: Personal Coach, Author, Healer |

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